My "Bright" Sight

I Am Da—the Ruchira Avatar, the Avatar of Infinite “Brightness”, Who Is the Heart Itself, the “Bright” Itself, and Love-Bliss-Happiness Itself. —“The ego-I Is The Illusion of Relatedness”, Santosha Adidam

As Avatar Adi Da made clear over and over again, the simple Sighting of the bodily form of one who has Realized the Divine Self-Condition (to some real and true degree of profundity)—and who is able to Transmit that Condition to those who are available to receive It—is what authentic Spirituality has always been about. Simply to behold the bodily form of such a Realizer-Transmitter—and, in response, to turn the entire being (or body, emotion, mind, and breath) to that one—catalyzes and magnifies the process of Spiritual growth in the devotee.

Particularly in the culture of India, such Sighting (or “Darshan”) of a True Realizer is widely acknowledged to be the fundamental reality of the Spiritual process.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Allow yourself to be Attracted by Me, to be Drawn into devotional Communion with Me—simply by the Sighting of My bodily (human) Form. —“Real self-Understanding Is Right Now”

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Sight Me, feel My Divine Transcendental Spiritual Self-Transmission, and Awaken in My Divine Avataric Company. Such practice is the “Locating” of Happiness. —“Come To Me When You Are Already Happy”

My Teaching Is This: Turn to Me, and understand.

Indeed, this two-part process—(1) turning to Him, and (2) understanding “self”—is the core Communication of all four volumes of The Divine Siddha-Method of The Ruchira Avatar: Turn to Him, the “Bright” Incarnation of the Very Divine, with your entire being (body, emotion, mind, and breath)—and, simultaneously, understand and transcend your own “self”-contracting activity that otherwise prevents the fullest turning to Him.

He Revealed, on many occasions, that His essential Divine Function was simply to Be Present in the world, Radiating His Transcendental Spiritual Transmission of Perfect Love-Bliss. But He also intuitively knew that, in order to draw a body of human beings into His Company, such that a culture of true devotional relationship to Him could be established, He would be required to Submit the Purity of His own Condition to relate to egos on their own terms—while simultaneously Revealing His Divine State, to those sensitive enough to receive that Revelation.

And, in the midst of such constant dialogue and investigation, Avatar Adi Da’s Submission-Work often involved relating to His devotees as a “friend”, as someone with whom they could feel “familiar”, thereby allowing devotees to freely participate with Him without reservation or armoring.

A woman had asked Bhagavan a few weeks earlier whether her continued prayers for her young son who had died were of any use, and Bhagavan had said yes, they were, and instructed her to continue to do so. Thus I anticipated Beloved Adi Da’s positive response. Beloved Adi Da responded that I was in fact spinning my wheels, and that my prayers and best heart-intentions were doing my father absolutely no good whatsoever! I was shocked. However, Bhagavan went on to describe how the dreams of my father were my own, and that I was refusing to deal with my own content. Thus, it had nothing to do with my father. The activity even of my prayer was one of seeking—in this case, seeking reunion with my father. But, He said, I was seeking reunion because I was already and actively separating myself from my father, at lightning speed, by my action of self-contraction. “You appear to be seeking, but you are actually separating.”

I was suddenly overcome with an overwhelming feeling of sorrow, and not really grasping this at all. I confessed this to Beloved Adi Da. “Sorrow because you are seeking what?” He asked. “It is about some ‘object’ or ‘other’—and, ultimately, it does not make a damn bit of difference what the ‘objects’ are. It is your own contraction that is the ‘root’ of the search. No contraction, no seeking.” He said I was playing the “have everything work out” game, playing “poor little Stevie”, who is not getting enough of all the things required to be fulfilled and be a happy man.

You are motivated by the stress of your own contraction. This is immediately obvious at a glance, and you are pretending not to be able to see it.” The sorrow, He said, was mourning over that from which I was separating myself. “You are just worshipping your own ‘self’-image and mourning over the lack of ‘self’-fulfillment.” Just as in my emotional-sexual patterning, it was all about me.

Again, I expressed how profoundly penetrating and useful this Instruction was for awakening greater self-understanding. And again, Beloved Adi Da did not permit me any space to hide. He insisted, “You are copping out.” I maintained that I did not want to cop out. “Yes, you do. Copping out is what you do. Then, after you cop out, you throw out a cloud of devotion and hide in the back of the room.”

Still feeling a struggle to keep myself above water, I strongly affirmed what I felt was real and true: “My devotion is in response to Your ‘Bright’ Attractiveness.” To which He immediately responded, “Very gratifying. And your lack of ‘self’-understanding is your nonresponse to My ‘Bright’ Attractiveness.”

STEVE: Late in the evening, after many hours of His continued “consideration”, “self”-Reflection, and Instruction, I confessed to Beloved Adi Da that when I felt into my own act of self-contraction, I felt I was making an error of meditating on myself. “No, no, enter into it deeply,” He said. “It is a feeling matter. It must be felt. No recourse, no diversions. This is what it takes to be a serious human being.” As I was telling Him how crystal clear it was that my life must be conformed to Him and to this process and “consideration” altogether, He interrupted and said, “Screw your life! It is of no importance, to anyone. It is going to be dashed to death by all the movements here. Realize where you are. If this world is all the ‘bucket’ of the ‘helpful Slave-God’, why isn’t everything OK? There is no such God. Never happened, never was. And yet, all the while, all the billions who have already died and are to die have been living here in this nakedness of their own illusions. As you are now. There is no Slave-God in charge. You are extremely mortal, right now. And all the powers that are, are here to eat you for breakfast. Utterly indifferently. Utterly! Therefore, you must vanish this disturbance by your superior gesture, your greater intelligence, your greater submission, your greater understanding. And if you do not do it, you are just going to be polished off like a slob.” 6

Avatar Adi Da could Stand entirely As He Is, in the Deep Silence of His Divine State—relinquishing the necessity to Speak, and wordlessly Transmitting His State directly to all. Such was—and is—His final and eternal manner of Working.

1. Guru, Faith, and Divine Communion

When you live in My Divine Avataric Company all the time, the mind and the questions dissolve, and you fall into the Sphere of the Heart Itself (or Self-Existing and Self-Radiant Conscious Light Itself). You do not necessarily consciously live As That yourself. Essentially, people do not do so—because, as soon as they move out of My physical Company, the ego-patterned mind is restored. But, once the Principle of devotional Communion with Me is truly lived, then the mind is constantly falling apart. It has no capability to survive in My Presence.

am always Testing you to see if you can Find Me when I am not physically Present. Thus, you may “experience” brief meetings with Me—and, then, apparent separations. When you are always able to Find Me, then I am Satisfied, then My Function has been Fulfilled.

It is not that, all of a sudden, you are just not interested, or you think that My bodily Form is an illusion. Rather, you feel the Principle That is Alive in and As My bodily Form to be Omnipresent—and this realization increases the intensity of your devotional recognition-response to My bodily (human) Divine Form.

Devotional Communion with Me is the key to all things, Spiritual and temporal. There is one Process and one Law. Those who speak of faith (even without “radical self-understanding”) are involved with the Principle of Divine Communion, because they somehow “know” that the “twenty watts” of their ordinary life contain practically nothing of the Vast Power of Existence. Faith is the presumption of the Vast Power, the “Unlimited Wattage” of the One Divine Reality.

The “Narcissistic” hope for the goods of life—“God, I want you to give me a million dollars”—is not faith. Faith is leaving behind the limited principle of the body-mind-“self” and the “world”, and presuming the Greater Principle of the Self-Existing and Self-Radiant Divine Reality. When faith becomes perfect, when it informs every fundamental area of your very existence, then order begins to be established in your life. In that case, instead of living the principle of karma, you live the life of Divine Communion.

To be free of karma does not mean that you disappear into the “soup”—never to have any “experiences” again and never to appear in any conditionally manifested state (whether cosmic or pre-cosmic). Divine Self-Realization is Freedom from the karmic processes of egoic “self”-identification (or separate-“self”-sense), egoic “self”-differentiation (or all the forms of “knowing”), and ego-based desire (or the endless adventure of seeking)—and is (Thus) Inherence in the Prior Principle of Truth Itself. Then, Truly, you are Free of the implications of birth and limitation and death—while, at the same time, appearing in the midst of the ordinary conditions that look like birth, limitation, and death.

Thus, Divine Self-Realization is absolutely compatible with participation in the creative process of conditionally manifested life. Therefore, the Divinely Self-Realized life always Manifests As Happiness (or Love-Bliss-Fullness), not as uptight detachment and “self”-concealment in the “soup” of some state that may be called “Self-Realization” but is only another form of illusion. Truly, one who is Divinely Self-Realized lives by Limitless Faith. Such a one constantly presumes the Perfect Divine Reality As the One Opportunity and Condition. Thus, such a one never presumes limitation in any form, always making room for the Spontaneous Manifestation of Realization and Happiness.

The Awakening Power of the Divine—what Christians call the “Holy Spirit”, the Initiating Grace that (likewise) has a name in every other tradition—is the Divine Gift to the community of practitioners, not merely the Kundalini “techniques” that purify the individual. At best, Kundalini Yoga is a means whereby individuals may become purified—but it is the Divine Spirit-Power That Awakens a community of true devotees, and (potentially) even all of humankind.

Many individuals must appear, many organizational entities must come into being, in order to establish the Full Circle in Which the Truth can Manifest.

2. Conversion To The Guru

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: The principle of ordinary life is conflict. It is unconsciousness. It is the strategies that people suffer in relation to one another. Freedom is not something that you do in the midst of that suffering. Freedom is not attained by any effort to bring suffering to an end—by analyzing yourself, analyzing the “world”, telling everybody “where they’re at”, “where you’re at”, changing your behavior patterns, having visions, believing things, doing your “number” on a life-level, or a “religious” level, or a Spiritual level, or whatever. All the games that people play out are reactions to the essential conflict of life. And life is conflict as long as it is lived from the “point of view” of its own principle, which is unconsciousness.

The person falls out of the ordinary disposition into the unreasonable Principle of Happiness (or Intrinsic Oneness with What Is Real, with the Divine State)—and, from that point onward, everything is answered, free, simplified.

Through the constant activity of seeking, a person acquires more and more baggage—mental, emotional, and physical. The person accumulates all kinds of modifications. But everything still amounts to that same condition, that dilemma. In some, the pressure of this inescapable dilemma builds to a psychosis or neurosis—or simply un-Happiness, or emptiness.

There is a traditional story told about the Sage Ribhu (a Realizer who lived in ancient India) and his disciple Nidagha. When Nidagha came to Ribhu, the Sage told Nidagha the Truth. Ribhu himself lived That Truth, and his speech represented That Truth—but Nidagha remained completely unavailable to It.

It is the turnabout from one principle to another, from the principle of ordinary birth to the Principle of Divine Communion, from the principle of the separate “self” to the Principle of the True “Self”, from the principle of the mind to the Principle of Perfect Consciousness, from the principle of desire to the Principle of Intrinsic Oneness and Fullness.

Likewise, the Christian minister saw Jesus, and he was converted. Like Nidagha, he had seen his Master in various ways before. He had read about him, thought about him, had a sense of some kind of relationship to him—but he did not see Jesus as Truth, as Guru. Previous to his turnabout, he was not in devotional Communion with Jesus—just

The Guru Is the Divine Function That Arises in the “world” and Serves the Illumination of human beings, whereby they “Know” their own True Nature Perfectly.

have no intention of being involved in an artificial version of Spiritual life. It is easy to become fascinating, to create games and illusions that motivate people. But the devotion of My true devotee is spontaneous, natural, genuine—free of any form of strategic motivation.

Move only where there is fire, the fire of your devotional response to Me.

3. Now It Belongs To God

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Patterns and “experiences” always come and go. That cycle never stops. Never. One who is Divinely Self-Realized still “experiences” that cycle as it is manifesting, within and without. It is just that his or her participation in the midst of what is arising is of another order than ordinary “experiencing”.

The principle to which “Narcissus” is committed is always magical. “Narcissus” wants to do something and have something happen as a result. But My devotee surrenders all concern, by devotionally turning to Me. Do not look for your turning to Me to prove itself in signs that the qualities of suffering are being transformed. Simply turn to Me. Allow the qualities to be whatever they are. Allow devotional Communion with Me to be not magical but miraculous.

Therefore, instead of the ego being the principle that is always “experiencing” all of this “stuff”, the Divine Itself is Realized to Be the One in Whom all of this arising is happening.

4. The Divine Does The Yoga

Somebody asked Jesus of Galilee what one should do, and Jesus said, “You should love the Lord your God with all of your heart, your soul, your mind, your strength, and love your neighbor as yourself.” In other words, in every function with which you can live in relationship, do just that. Turn to the Divine with every one of your faculties, with all of your psycho-physical life—and love all beings. Let your functions live directly—in relationship, open. Let them be vehicles of the Force (or Communicated Existence) of the Divine.

In every place in you where there is no love, no Freedom, no Happiness, no True Humor, no free energy, you are contracted. That is all that has happened—avoiding relationship. And wherever there is devotional Communion with Me, no-contraction, no-avoidance, there is this continuousness, this flow-without-dilemma.

Thus, the Divine Siddhi Is a Purifying Force. But the Divine Siddhi is not just a Purifying Force. It happens to be Purifying because the beginning devotee is impure, unable to conduct and live the Prior Condition in consciousness and in the vehicles of his or her life. Therefore, the Divine Presence Manifests all these purifying phenomena. But the (so-called) “Purpose” of the Divine is not to purify or to do anything else but to be Present, to Be Reality Itself.

Devotional Communion with Me is not a matter of becoming concerned for anything that arises in My Company, but to be more and more involved in the Intuition of the Divine. Ultimately, when all of that purification has fulfilled itself to a sufficient degree, you will only be Intuiting the Divine.

But a fundamental characteristic of My devotee is True Humor, because My devotee does not live merely in all of these conditions that are arising. Rather, My devotee lives in the Love-Bliss of Limitless Divine Communion. There are all these phenomena that, from the traditional “point of view”, you are supposed to be very serious about and concerned about—and such phenomena may be arising, in some form, with anyone who lives in devotional Communion with Me. But, at the same time that all of that is occurring, My devotee is humorous, unconcerned, living devotional Communion with Me as his or her Condition, as the Principle of Real Spiritual life in My Company, rather than all of the potential phenomena.

My true devotee is continually Happy—if he or she is Reality-intelligent. My true devotee is constantly discarding all purification, and all of the hopefulness that purification suggests to the poor little mind. The poor little mind is easily taken in by anything extraordinary. Therefore, those who live in devotional Communion with Me are very often confronted with “experiences” that the poor little mind wants to be very involved in, wants to become very hopeful about, very interested in. But that is just another way of falling out of devotional Communion with Me, becoming “self”-concerned again.

Hopefulness is a form of concern. Why should you be hopeful? How mediocre! The only reason you need to be hopeful is because you basically feel desperate, hopeless, and un-Happy.

The so-called “higher powers” that may be felt or “known” in the Transcendental Spiritual Process in My Company serve this testing. The Energy that creates conditions is always happy to create a limited condition for you, happy to manifest the limited mind and a secondary fulfillment, a consolation, a fascination, a path—if you want one.

purification. Whatever conditions arise in your life—whether apparently good or apparently bad—they are conditions in which you must be intelligent.

5. I Assume Your Enlightenment

The process of devotional Communion with Me is not a process in which you are given a “remedy” for your “problem”, a “cure” that you are supposed to apply to yourself, but a process in which the Fundamental Condition is the devotional relationship to Me.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: You read about sacrifice in the “New Testament” and other traditional scriptures. Everybody talks about sacrifice and loving one another—but it is all so humorless. As soon as you set about trying to love everybody, you become a humorless asshole. As soon as you start to make sacrifices, you become a high mucky-muck. You are not really sacrificing. You are only ritually duplicating the law of Nature. Sacrifice, or love, is what is already occurring. It is the nature of life. No special action needs to be added to your life to make it sacrifice. You simply have to become sensitive to what your life already is. Then, spontaneously, you will live the Divine Law, and you will love.

Love is the nature of sacrifice. Sacrifice is not putting your cape in the mud so that somebody can step on it. Love is living without obstruction, without contraction, without the demand for attention, without creating your perimeter. That does not come about by doing all kinds of things to yourself. It is a Grace, Divinely Given. It is devotional Communion with Me. It is the life of “radical self-understanding”.

Loving is also pleasurable, there is no doubt about it. Ecstasy is selflessness. Happiness is already sacrifice.

sacrifice. The conventionally “religious” person tends to say: “Sacrifice is doing those things that I do not like to do. And, if I make sure not to enjoy all those things that I do like, that will also be sacrifice.” But sacrifice is the nature of all of that, including both the apparently pleasurable and the apparently unpleasurable.

It is an intense pleasure to be without separate “self”—to be without that demand, to be without that contraction. Instead of contraction, there is openness. That is sacrifice—and it is pleasurable. Holding back is not pleasurable at all. There is no flow to it. It is filled with uncomfortable sensations, with ambiguity, mystery, unconsciousness, and pain. When release occurs, it is pleasurable. You cannot perform it ritually or willfully—but, in devotional Communion with Me, the pleasure of non-contraction becomes your natural state, the quality of your presence in the “world”.

Wherever there is the spontaneous release of separate “self”, there is pleasure and sacrifice. Wherever there is the motivated attempt to be released from separate “self”, there is no sacrifice and, usually, no pleasure—because the egoic “self” is the principle of such motivation.

You must stop meditating on your own garbage. Night and day, you meditate on the same old shit, you go through the same round of up-and-down, the same old stupidity. You talk about the same old shit, manifest the same old nothing, such that there is no life, no fullness, no juice—and no God. How could you possibly Find Real God by meditating on your mind? You will find only your mind!

“mind”. There is no God to be found in such a process. Real God is Prior to all of that. Understanding the process of mind is the only thing that is useful. Everything else is a modification of mind, and everybody is clinging to and meditating upon all kinds of modifications—including very dramatic “experiences”, such as those that were Given by Me to My devotees for their “consideration” during the “Garbage and the Goddess” Teaching-Demonstration.

All those “experiences” and phenomena—everything from high winds and coronas around the sun to swooning ecstasies, kriyas, and visions—were a test. None of them had any significance whatsoever. But such “experiences” were an intense fascination for those who had them. It was something that people “bought”, wholeheartedly. People held on to those “experiences”.

The arising of fascinating phenomena is not significant, nor do “experiences” (in and of themselves) serve anything. “Experiences” are just “stuff”. To Realize Consciousness Itself is the Ultimate Demand, and that Realization has nothing whatsoever to do with the things that arise. In time, you will be Happy to Stand Prior to all arising. When the mind is finally quiet and the body is finally quiet, when you are no longer fascinated by visions, when nothing grabs you anymore, then you simply dwell in the Absolute Intuition of Real God. Real God is as Present in this moment as Real God is ever going to be.

Happiness Itself only requires that you live in devotional Communion with Me with great intensity, with perfect attention—ceasing to be concerned for all the things that arise by tendency in your case, and (likewise) ceasing to be concerned for all the phenomena that are stimulated by the Force of My Divine Siddhi.

Thus, your life must become like a mirage around you. Your thoughts and inclinations, your tendencies and desires, your conditions and dispositions, things you own, things you look forward to—everything must become like images flashing at night. Everything must become no more important than the remnants of a dream that you playfully allow to continue as you are waking up in the morning.

6. Faith and Patience

It will ferry you across the ocean of samsar [the “world” and conditionally manifested existence as illusion, as a condition felt independent of the Divine Reality]. Saburi destroys fear and removes all afflictions. From Saburi alone, success comes. Oh, mother, have Faith in what I say. Your Faith in my words is called nistha. Sraddha also means the same. Saburi and Sraddha are twin sisters. My glance will give you protection. Make me the sole object of your thoughts. If you do so, you will realize whatever you want. I will not give you any mantra at all. Do not also try to get a mantra from any one else. If you follow my upadesam [or instruction] given to you today, you will realize paramartha [or the highest Spiritual Truth]. Look at me with all your mind and with all your heart. I will look at you in the same manner. Oh, mother Radhabai, sitting in this musjid, I speak the Truth at all times. I speak nothing but the Truth. I tell you that no sadhana is necessary for you.

The practice in devotional Communion with Me is exactly that. Give Me your attention, live with Me, gaze upon My Form, study My Teaching-Word, do what I Ask you to do, understand your own ego-activity—and that is it.

The traditions of conventional Yoga and conventional Spirituality are all the paths of seeking to attain God (or Realization, or Liberation, or Nirvana). But the Way of the Siddhas is to live with Real God, to live in Real God presently, as your presumed Nature, Condition, and State. The Siddha comes and manifests the Divine and expects you to live with him or her—not to seek for God, but simply to live with him or her.

As My devotee, you no longer have the right to your “bad days” or your “phases”. They will inevitably occur as part of the process of ego-transcending practice in My Divine Avataric Company, but I do not want to see a sign of it on your faces or in your outward lives. I do not want to see any drama. I have not come so that you can persist in ignorance and mediocrity, showing Me no life, no energy, no intelligence, no attention. Such tendencies are within you, but so what? So you will have to do a little practice! The difficulty required of one who lives the life of devotional Communion with Me is nothing compared to the practice that the seeker must perform!

DEVOTEE: Beloved Lord, during my daily schedule of work, I get a little confused about what form of attention I should give to You—whether I should be in relation to my work or whether I should turn to You.

While you are in the midst of some functional activity, I do not ask you to put your attention on another activity in the mechanical and ritualistic manner of the seeker. You are asked to make the function that is given to you at that moment (which you are fulfilling as a responsibility) an expression of devotional Communion with Me, a fulfillment of My Instruction. That very function itself should become meditation on Me. While you are fulfilling it, you are not asked to somehow mechanically think of Me. The function that you are performing—done purely, directly, with True Humor, understanding, and freedom—is, itself, meditation, or devotional Communion with Me. Then, when it is an appropriate time to sit in meditation in the functional manner I have Described, you do that. You do precisely that at that moment.

The man who prays for forgiveness and then makes love to his wife is always confused. When he is praying, he wants to be making love to his wife, and when he is making love to his wife, he wants to be praying. As a result, he never actually does any of the things that are required of him. He fulfills none of the Guru’s Admonitions, and never lives in the Happiness of Divine Communion. The recollection of My Divinely-Avatarically-Born bodily (human) Divine Form in the mind and through feeling is a random and spontaneous process. It is much like the random and spontaneous recollection of a loved one. It is not even “much like” that—it is precisely that. It is not limited to the romantic qualities of a mere love affair, but there is that same random, loving recollection.

There are times when the intensity of your love-feeling for Me may make it difficult for you to function. Even so, you must still function. But what you are describing to Me is not love for your Guru making it difficult for you to work. You are describing a lack of capability to work and a lack of capability to have such devotional feelings for Me. What you describe is just confusion. Until the practice of Adidam is fulfilled in you, with great intensity and clarity—until it really becomes “radical” devotion to Me, in every moment—live as My beginning devotee. Be very practical. Fulfill your obligations to Me. One of your obligations is that you should work. Therefore, when you are working, work. I also Expect that you maintain a clean and conscious living circumstance. Therefore, do that when you are at home. At times, you must have attention on your diet, because right dietary practice is required of you. Therefore, do that when you prepare or sit for meals. When you are expected to meditate, do that. And, when you are expected to participate in the formal Sighting of My bodily (human) Divine Form, then do that.

7. The Grace of Suffering

Recently, I became very sick, probably more sick than I have been in years. And I found that I could not maintain any connection to the practice.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: How terrifying to be in such a position! [In a humorous tone:] I certainly hope you learned from this observation and will do better next time!

My devotee is always seeing that he or she cannot fulfill the practice I have Given. You are continually being shown the failure of your life, the conventional strategy of your life, the false commitment of your life. Such inspection is an absolutely necessary part of the practice. The practice is not about winning! It is about Truth, Freedom in God! There are no winners in God—none. Thus, the manifestation of your tendencies is a principal aspect of your devotional life. I assume you noticed this?

You have only to become ill and suddenly you forget Me! This is a useful lesson. The body becomes ill, and you do not want to fulfill the discipline that I have Given you. You find yourself possessed by another interest—that is, the body in and of itself becomes the principle by which you define yourself. Further on in the process, when you can pass through such a physical episode relative to the body or your life-circumstances without being so heavily perturbed, you will begin to see that you define yourself on some more subtle level, in the mind or in the deep psyche.

Before you come to acknowledge your dis-ease, you think of the “world” as a “something”. You “objectify” it as a place, a finite circumstance, a fixed material event—just as you “objectify” yourself. You imagine that the “world” is a massive, solid, physical process, and that your own functions, even your thinking, are a dead end of chemicals. You go on living that solid, muscular life until you begin to suffer. Then you cannot be blithe and naive any longer.

What does the notion of “saving the world” mean? What is the “world”? The notion of “saving the world” is just as absurd as the notion that you are going to go back into your dream-“world” tonight and save that!27

When you wake up from a dream, you have no concern for the dream-“world”. Having awakened, you have no inclination to save anybody that you met in dreams, or to be saved yourself! The gorilla can chase you all night, but, when you wake up in the morning, there is no gorilla, no threat. Then who cares?

Suffering is your action. Therefore, it is the action of “self”-contraction, of “self”-definition, of obsession with whatever is arising in and of itself—independent of its Ground, or its “Substance”, or its True Condition, Which is Divine. The action that is suffering produces the usual life as karma, illusion, negative destiny, unconsciousness. Therefore, the Reality-Way of Adidam necessarily involves a life of counter-action—of doing something other than “self”-contraction—as a specific responsibility.

8. Guru Is The Function of God

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Not exactly! There is a sense in which that description may be true enough for you, but the Reality-Way of Adidam is not a ding-dong way of life in which you get to be blissful all the time! What most people regard to be “bliss” (such as what people “experience” when they do a little Hatha Yoga) is basically a condition of the nervous system. True Bliss, the Divine Love-Bliss, Is the Enjoyment of the Divine Self-Nature, Self-Condition, and Self-State of Reality Itself—and Its Most Perfect Realization requires the most perfect transcending of egoity.

10. The Rhythmic Incident of Separate self

You are completely aware of it. You recoil from it, and thereby create your entire life, your entire adventure, all of your “subjectivity”, and the mood of your person. If you penetrated it, you would be free. What is it?

Before there is a thought, what do you hold on to most dearly?

When the mind is rested from action, when there is no thinking, when even the breathing is still—what is going on?

It is the beat of the heart. When the mind stops and action stops and breath comes to rest, the thing that defines you is the heartbeat.

The heartbeat in the center of the bodily being is the ego’s ultimate meditation. The heartbeat is the single motivator of life.

Everything that lives, everything that is “self”-conscious, is meditating on the beat (or intensity) that is the heart. The heartbeat alone is responsible for the entire adventure and complication of existence.

You do not beat the heart. Yet, the heartbeat alone is responsible for your belief in your own existence. If the heartbeat ceases, you have no such belief.

When you are moving into Infinity, the heartbeat presses on your conscious awareness, defining you. Everything is created in rhythm with that stroke—everything. Until you are no longer bound by the beating of the heart, you are structured in the egoic dream. You are interrupted in Infinity by the beating of the heart, by birth itself.

Everything above the heart, every thought or vision or contemplated wonder, is an expression of that foundation liveliness, that beating. Everything below it, every feeling and sensation, is an expression of it. The heartbeat is “me” and “that”, left and right, up and down, in and out. It is the total conception of existence. Everything is implied by it.

Like the clock that creates time, the heartbeat creates the “self”. The heartbeat is the most primitive incident, the center of fear. It is a metronome in an empty room.

That rhythm is pronounced on the left, but it surges between the right and the left. There is no actual rhythm on the right—but only a constant feeling-intensity, the “root”-stroke of the beating heart, a constant sense of “self”-definition and “self”-absorption, contracted from Infinity.

One’s very existence pulses in Mystery, subject to the Perfectly

Un-“knowable” Prior Condition (to Which the will must, at last, bow—with all of mind, emotion, body, and breath).

When the heartbeat ceases, you are released to your Prior Disposition—but only momentarily, since mere death is not sufficient for Divine Liberation.

Divine Liberation is Freedom from that rhythm while alive—to be no longer interrupted, no longer egoically “self”-identified with left and right, up and down, in and out, here and there, now and then.

Why do you doubt the Reality of the Divine, the Unchanging, the Absolute?

It is the recoil that thunders back from all appearance. There is no human being who has not suffered this incident. The heartbeat is the same as your own birth, or life, or death. And all of that, everything “experienced” or “known”, is reaction to this rhythmic contraction, or “root”-feeling-intensity. Thus, everything is betrayal, a witness for the lie.

The only recourse while alive is the most absolute, most perfect “self”-sacrifice, transcending all thought—in mood, in action, in feeling, in desire—to the point of most perfect surrender to Me. That is what characterizes My devotee.

Divine Liberation requires the penetration of that signal. Until then, there is betrayal, separation, ego, mind, person, separate destiny, action, illusion, dreams, “knowledge”, fascinated meditation, sublimity, absorption, discrimination, consolation, good feeling, profundity, eagerness, fear, sorrow, anger, hatefulness, “me”, “I”, “within”.

The traditions seek to escape the dilemma of existence. Samadhis associated with the

crown of the head are subtle, and depend on the ego-illusion. In such Samadhis, the independent “self”-illusion remains, the one who “experiences” remains—not yet penetrated.

After all, the “I”-thought arises in the brain. It is part of the subtle mechanism. It is a thought, a literal thought—“I”, part of the lower mind.

But the contraction that is responsible for the “I”-thought (and all other thoughts and feelings of independence) is at the heart itself.

You must give up your life of egoic “self”-identification with the rhythm, the contraction, the recoil that defines you. And how do you give it up? It is impossible. It cannot be done by the one who would do it.

you move beyond the contracted disposition. You must move beyond fear and sorrow and anger into the disposition of love, of Radiance—Prior to any form of contraction or separation. You must presume the Radiance of Happiness as a discipline—in spite of all “subjective” signs to the contrary. All the disciplines of the Reality-Way of Adidam are forms of Radiance, of Non-contraction and Non-separation, of love, of bringing un-contracted energy—rather than your “knowledge”, desire, and ego-possession—into the realms of “experience”.

That passage is madness, healed and cooled only by motiveless (or loving) devotional Communion with Me—Which now, in your presumed “knowledge”, you deny. Be wary of your own “knowledge”, of your own “good feeling”, of all the things that make you feel better or worse. They console you behind the pulsation of birth. The heartbeat is the ultimate vulnerability, the great fear.

Turn the total body-mind-“self” to Me, and Listen to My Communication, My Fundamental Argument—and live the right-life disciplines I Give to you. Do not be separative, egoic, emotional, contractive, negative, angry, fearful, sorrowful—but be full of energy and

You should look and feel and be and act completely Happy under all conditions. Change your manner of action, and the “subjective” dimension itself will also naturally change.

The born condition precedes all “subjectivity”. You want to manipulate your “subjectivity” first—your feelings, your thinking, your conceptions, and your separate-“self”-sense. You want to change them before you will change your way of life. You want to be free inside before you will love, before you will act differently.

Either you change your action or you do not. You must begin to do so. There is nothing more that can be said, nothing more convincing than that. You simply must begin to do it. As you begin to do it, the vulgar disposition of your internal life and your “subjective” tendencies will continue. You must not be concerned about that. Tendencies are only the signs of your old manner of living. Let them pass. Live differently now. Love. Serve with feeling. Put your attention on My Instruction to you. Be transformed by ego-transcending devotional Communion with Me. And act differently. The new “subjectivity” will follow. “Subjective” internal changes, emotional and mental, will follow.

enthusiastic in them. Bring life to all beings. Bring life to the tree. Bring life to the doorknob. Bring life to Me! Then you will see your “subjective” life changing, over time.

Now you are waiting for your “insides” to change first. But they are the last to change! Your action must change first. Then the “inner” being will reflect the new (rather than the old) adaptation. Having seen what you have seen, and heard what you have heard, act differently. Kick everything else aside. Turn to Me. Listen to Me. Love, serve, bring life—that is the discipline. The emotions and the mind will persist in their aggravation, their negativity, their ego-possession, their sulking stupidity.

“Subjectivity” follows action.

And you will, perhaps, hear and see all kinds of incredible things. I have heard and seen all of it, every kind of audition and vision and transport. It is all an hallucination. It is all ridiculous. It is

nonsense. It is stupid and false. There is no vision that is true. It is all bondage. It is all something to console the separate one. Press through all of that in devotional Communion with Me, and you will become coincident with the whole bodily being, no longer turning toward your “subjectivity”. You will stand as the whole body—and, suddenly, the Prior Condition of the whole body will become Obvious.

There is no “me” within. There is no one to survive. There Is the Most Absolute, Unlimited, and Unspeakable Reality—Which Is Love-Bliss-Fullness, without description, without form, without argument, without a single symbol to win its victory over living beings.

You are always certain, in this instant, what it is to be completely Happy—to look and feel and be and act completely Happy. It is always true of you, inherently. You can always return to this inherent sense of Happiness. You could be and look and feel completely Happy in this moment. But you do not. Why? Because of your sympathy with the born condition that is rhythmed to you, moment to moment—this pulsation, or “self”-sense, in the chest. Pass beyond it in devotional Communion with Me, and you will Realize the Divine Self-Nature, Self-Condition, and Self-State of Reality Itself. But not before.

By Sighting Me and Listening to Me, you are disposed to act—not to internalize, but to act without concern for your “subjectivity”. “Subjectivity” is only the sign of your old adaptation—whereas you have become disposed to act differently, to love, to be Radiant in relations (rather than contracting in the forms of anger, and sorrow, and fear, and thinking, and all of the illusions of your own “subjectivity”).

11. The World Is An Hallucination In Consciousness

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: In Truth, this conditionally manifested appearance, in which you are animated to one another in the waking state, is an hallucination that occurs in Consciousness Itself. All these trees, buildings, bodies, hairs, and thoughts arise as modifications of a Single and Absolute Field That Is Perfect Radiance. The “world” is a conception, as completely non-necessary as a thought or a dream. And it is just as humorous, just as arbitrary and unserious, as any dream.

Repetition is “self” and mind and body—including all relations and environments. Repetition is consolation, or distraction from fear.

My Reality-Teaching is a Penetrating Criticism—a Goad to Awakening to the non-necessity of things. My Communication of Truth, My Argument and Influence, Works to Undermine the droning trance in which you exist in the waking state (and in all other states of “experience”).

This body is, presently, an hallucination in the Field of “Brightness”. When you can see that the body and the mind and the sense of separate identity itself all arise in the Field of “Brightness” as mere modifications, then you will have True Humor relative to the affair of waking life. Then the great adventure—of trying to attain a “victory”, or trying to find the “great goal” for which all beings are born—will come to an end. You will be Free—but not until then. Until then, you are bound to discover (through all the means of strategic release) some sort of extraordinary occasion that will console “you” as an entity.

Therefore, on the basis of your trouble, your motivation to feel good is intensified. But the entire search—the entire drama of getting to Truth—is a lie.

are like, what your True Condition must be. But your True Condition is Prior to “experience”. Your True Condition Is Reality, the Force of Existence—Which is Eternally Prior to all arising, and within Which (or as a modification of Which) conditional arising occurs. Only by Realizing That Condition are you properly related to all the limitations that rise and fall—waking, dreaming, and sleeping, gross, subtle, and causal—in this “world” or any other “world”.

True Awakening is penetration, in the present moment, of the presumption of the necessity and independence of your apparent (or “experienced”) condition. This penetration is not the same as the glamorous path of “going within”, of achieving a victorious “subjectivity”.

The meaning-force of birth seems to imply independence—and people meditate on that separation constantly. Thus, people are looking for release in the context of presumed separation. However, instead of being released, they are burdened, impinged upon by endless effects.

What you know of dreams should illumine your position in the waking state.

Clearly, the dream is the product of your own individual consciousness. It is your dream.

“Consider” how serious you are in the waking state. You are trying to make philosophy here, but you are doing exactly what people do in dreams.

Sometimes good things are happening, sometimes bad things. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. You have assumed this hallucination as your condition. You are trying to make philosophy. You listen to Spiritual teachings, you take up practices, you believe this and that. You may feel that you have grasped it now. Now you may feel consoled. But you must Wake Up!

Nothing else is Happiness. Nothing less than or other than That is Liberation. Not a single thought, conception, or “experience” (high or low) is anything but a permutation of the dream. Only the Awakening Itself, in Which there is nothing happening, is Liberation from the motivated distress of all things happening.

Therefore, if you Realize the True Condition of the “knower-I”, you also Realize the True Condition of all conditional manifestation.

If you presume the condition (or effect) of any particular modification, rather than That in Which the modification arises, then that effect becomes necessary—and the presumption that it is your condition reinforces a complex adventure in which you are the implied “knower-I”, separate from events. But, if you break through that presumption—and if you are presently existing as the Prior, Boundless, and Absolute Condition—then the arising phenomena have a paradoxical significance. They are non-necessary, they are humorous, they are fluid, they are not binding. The entire adventure they imply—negative or positive—is non-necessary, un-True. Everything that arises—“subjective” or “objective”—is a portion of the dream. In and of itself, it has nothing to do with Real (Acausal) God, or Truth Itself. Truth Itself can be Realized only in present-time freedom from the dream, no matter what may be arising.

The heat is not some negative side-effect. The heat is free attention, available for this profundity. Secondarily, it is painful, in a sense—but it is free. It is available force, free attention. Attention is not otherwise so available, because it is usually sunk into dramatizations and distractions.

12. I Will Do Everything

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Everybody is like an archaeological site—a place where archaeologists dig through the ground, finding towns and specimens of history (biological or animal or human cultural history) in strata.

And, if you act differently, then the old adaptations that are your “subjectivity” will have no force. They will not be animated. Even though you may feel them in various ways, you are not the archaic personality that is arising. If you will presume the discipline of sacrificing old adaptation, then all your so-called “insides” become obsolete, dormant, without function anymore, without energy.

Once you Hear Me,36 the past has no great force and no great importance—in spite of all apparently “subjective” evidence. Thus, the foundation level of practice is persistence in devotion and love, without concern for “subjective” evidence.

They only crave the drink because it seems to be a kind of release. Most people who are involved in Yogic and mystical practices are like alcoholics. They do not observe what is going on in their visions and psychic “experiences”. They are stimulated by them. Subtle “experiences” become things-of-value in and of themselves. Such people call their “experience” of the subtle realm “Divine Realization”. But it is not. Rather, it is “self”-intoxication, ego-possession in the subtle form.

The right-life disciplines of the Reality-Way of Adidam cut through all those tendencies (or archaic “solutions”).

In the Seeing stages of the Reality-Way of Adidam, the illusions of the subtle dimension are penetrated, until even the illusion of attention (or of the separate “self” itself) is penetrated—such that, Ultimately, you Realize the Condition That is Prior to body, emotion, mind, “self”, and “world”. Your True Condition is Most Perfectly Realized only when you Tacitly Exist As Consciousness moment to moment—without form, Inherently Centerless, Identical to the Absolute That is Unnamed, Un-“known”, Identical to Divine Ignorance, Limitless Divine Self-Radiance. You must Realize That actually, presently, Prior to the arising of any “experience”.

In seventh stage Sahaja Nirvikalpa Samadhi, there is a Uniquely-by-Me Revealed and Given Divine Transcendental Spiritual Yoga that is not described in the traditional texts. It is the Yoga of Atma Nadi, in Which every condition arising is Divinely Self-Recognized as a transparent (or merely apparent) modification of the Prior Self-Nature, Self-Condition, and Self-State of all-and-All. Everything arising is without force—non-necessary, and intrinsically non-binding. In that moment to moment Realization, the limiting (or binding) force of existence at every level is lost, and you are Established in the Transcendental Spiritual Nature, Condition, and State That Is the Self-Radiance of Self-Existing Being Itself. This Realization Self-Radiates Infinitely, Absolutely—Beyond what is seen and heard subtly, Beyond all that is perceived. Thus, there is a kind of Ascent that is Native to seventh stage Sahaja Nirvikalpa Samadhi—because all phenomena (gross, subtle, and causal) are non-necessary. Not because they do not arise—they continue to appear in the usual fashion—but because they have no necessity. They do not impinge upon you. They do not have any implication or logic that binds you to being an “anything”—a “soul”, a person, a consciousness, a separate phenomenon or being. In That Most Perfect Realization, There Is Only the Absolute Self-Radiance of the Heart Itself, felt (in relation to the gross body) as the “Regenerated” Form of Atma Nadi,37 or the Self-Current of Conscious Light That Shines Boundlessly between the right side of the bodily apparent heart and the Matrix Infinitely Above the mind and the total crown of the head—Infinitely Beyond and Prior to any phenomena at all.

The tendency will be frustrated—and, instead of meditating on your “subjectivity”, you will meditate on the fire of your attention to Me. If you will fulfill the forms of right-life discipline I Give you for the sake of your Divine Liberation, then your attention to Me from hour to hour will become more fiery, more intense, more loving, more “self”-sacrificial—less and less the character you are born to be and live and die.

14. Come To Me When You Are Already Happy

It is not enough that what I am Saying is True. What I am Saying must also be understood by you, most profoundly. You must observe yourself, observe all of the means represented by your life, and see that you are always un-Happy, and always trying to become Happy.

The supportive practices of the Reality-Way of Adidam are not “methods” for attaining Happiness. Rather, they are the expressions of Happiness Already Realized. The disciplines of “money, food, sex, and social egoity” are not a means to become Happy. Discipline is difficult enough—why should you also burden it with the obligation to make you Happy!

It is a Criticism of your entire life. No congratulations whatsoever come to you through confrontation with My Reality-Teaching and with Me. Why should you be congratulated? You are un-Happy! Un-Happiness is a common attainment. Why should you want to settle for your present state? Why should you want to be congratulated in it? You have not even begun, and already you want to be acknowledged for having attained Realization!

The fundamental condition of existence is participatory relationship with the Divine, or the obligation to transcend egoity.

What else is hell but a place of “self”-obsession, of bewilderment without release? This is a tormented place, even though it is not necessarily tormented by constant fires and people gnawing on your skull (although such things do happen).

Such Great Ones become a Mechanism in cosmic Nature that Serves the possibility of Awakening in others.

If those who had (to one or another significant degree) Realized the Way of Truth did not turn about and Serve others, this would truly be a hell—instead of being like a hell.

The “world” in its hellish form is at war with Happiness.

All other difficulties, or forms of tapas,41 are simply expressions of this one fundamental tapas, the great heat of the Real-God-Realizing Process.

And what is the Real-God-Realizing Process, ultimately? It is a matter of keeping attention in My Well of Happiness—My Divine Self-Condition, the present Locus in Which Happiness (or My Transcendental Spiritual Current of Divine Love-Bliss) is actually felt—and, on that basis, magnifying the practice of devotion to Me, service to Me, “self”-discipline in devotional recognition-response to Me, and meditation on Me.

You will find it extremely difficult to do those things—and, in any case, you will not do them rightly.

Everything is un-Happiness except the “Locating” of Happiness. All other pursuits are contraction from Happiness. Therefore, you must found your existence on Happiness.

There is no separation. Therefore, you should magnify the Glory of Real God—in your own form, and also beyond your own form. To be in Real God, to understand your separate and separative “self” (which is the belief in disease), and to be free of “self” in every moment, and (thus) to be magnified and purified in the Happiness of the Glorious Starry God—such is the business of life.

Life is not suffering! Life, in and of itself, is suffering. By itself, separated, it is suffering. But life is not in principle, or in its Real Condition, suffering. Life is Inherence in the Great One. Life is Happiness. Life, in its Real Condition, transcends its own limitations. Therefore, the notion of disease and un-Happiness and the unsaved life of “sinfulness” and all the monotony of conventional “religion” has nothing whatsoever to do with the Truth. Real God Is the Truth, and Real God Is the Principle of your existence.

16. Surrender Without Limitation

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: But you are not doing it quite yet. You are satisfied with a twenty-watt connection to your muladhar. But I am Telling you that the “conductivity” in the frontal line must be full all the way down to the base of the body. That means you must be released of your anxiety. And that requires great force of practice and Great Grace (Which is Freely Given to you).

You must get in touch with that limit and stop holding on to it in order to live your lifetime as My devotee, rather than living your lifetime as a “fan” of Mine—toying with the practice, fulfilling it only minimally.

You do not have to work on your karmas—in other words, you do not have to live this life as a hell—in order to get rid of all “this”. In fact, if you do that, you will never get rid of “this”. You must Realize Real God, utterly surrendered to the Divine Self-Condition. Your karmas fall away when they are not used. Therefore, you must become much more passionately involved with Me, truly surrendered to Me beyond your emotional limit. You must really do so—really.

I have “Considered” the matter of emotional-sexual life in great detail—because sex is one of the primary means whereby people withdraw from Real Happiness. This is why, in the traditions, people have often chosen celibacy. I Call you to observe and understand the entire emotional-sexual process, and to abandon everything about it that is withdrawal from My Divine Love-Bliss. Do not go to war with the emotional-sexual function, but oblige it to become a form of devotional Communion with Me. Then whatever you do sexually that is a form of devotional Communion with Me is good sex and no “sin”. I am Calling you to live a “sinless” life. The “sinless” life is not the life of socially prescribed good behaviors. It is the life of Divine Communion, in which all behaviors are enacted in devotional Communion with Me.

If you are living as an anxious neurotic every day of your life, what could you possibly be communicating to anyone else except that state? DEVOTEE: That is not my experience every day. I do go beyond that. AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: But you are still making the report of “experiencing” it. If you are really going beyond it, mark My words, you will not be able to report a chronic state of suffocation and anxiety.

You know what it is like to crave the usual things in life. You must, instead, crave the Bliss, the Happiness, of devotional Communion with Me. You must be utterly dissatisfied with anything less—such that, in every moment, you will make the gesture that moves beyond the knot of “self”-contraction and surrenders to That Which Pervades time and space and is (in Reality) Where you Stand.

Therefore, everybody becomes a philosopher. Everybody becomes a “self-guru”. People are “self”-generating their own “dharma”, by piecing this and that together from what they read in books, thinking in their rooms, and indulging themselves. To what end? To become one of the Adepts, a Great Realizer, to Divinely Translate Beyond? No such “self”-indulgent and “self-guruing” individual has ever Realized Real God. This has never happened. On the other hand, millions, billions, of people have done the kind of thing you are suggesting.

It assigns great weight to what is ordinary and limiting, and it finds all kinds of reasons not to assign the same importance to What Is Truly Great. This is why very few people have ever done the great practice. Very few people have Realized anything. Very few human beings have moved beyond the first three stages of life.

Many people presume to have a personal Spiritual relationship with some Great Adept-Realizer of the past, but it is sheer imagination! It is nonsense! It has nothing to do with the Real Spiritual process. It is an ordinary human form of idealistic “religiosity”, whereby people console themselves in the context of the first three stages of life. They concoct an imaginary “Friend” to make them feel that they always have somebody at

That is the greatness of such a relationship. That is the Advantage that the devotional relationship to Me represents. It cuts through bullshit, if you are willing to use the relationship. Of course, if you are not willing, then you do not use it. Some people obviously make the choice not to use it. Things do not have to work out in this “world”. It does not have to work out that everyone becomes a Spiritually advanced being. Hardly anyone ever has. Something else is going on here. This “world” is not Enlightening people. This “world” is a limitation given for its own sake. It has its own rules, and its own games. It is traditionally called “maya”, the great illusion and entanglement—an incomprehensible illusion.

18. Be Purposed To My Divine Samadhi

Therefore, I have Indicated more disciplines, more things that must be taken into account, relative to each of the stages of practice-demonstration in the Reality-Way of Adidam. But the complex aspects of My Instruction are elaborated on the basis of the original simplicity of devotional Communion with Me.

The Reality-Way of Adidam is a total Way of life. It is a life-occupation. It is something you do with your existence altogether. That is it. You live your life for the sake of Real-God-Realization. Somebody else may live life for the sake of being a firefighter or a nuclear physicist or something. But, as My devotee, you live your life for Real-God-Realization. There is no point in asking Me, “How can I accommodate the practice in Your Company to this and that thing I want to do with my life?” You cannot! You must devote your entire life to Real God! I Am here to Serve that purpose in you. If you are here for the sake of Real-God-Realization, then I can be of use to you. If you have some other purpose, then I cannot be very useful to you. I can be an inspiration to you in the moment, if you happen to be available for just a moment—but nothing can really come of that.

You must devote your entire life to Me, to the practice of Adidam, to the by-Me-Given process of Real-God-Realization. You must give up all purposes for your present lifetime other than the purpose of Real-God-Realization! It is just that simple. You give up your life for Real God. You give your life to the process of Real-God-Realization. That is it! Of course, you have friendships, you may have an intimate relationship, you have your living circumstance. You work, you serve in various ways. All of that is fine and good. But all of that must be transformed, disciplined, so that it works for the sake of Realization—and whatever about it does not work for Realization must be changed, must be surrendered to the real ego-transcending process in My Divine Avataric Company.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: In what direction? Choices of what kind? DEVOTEE: I see myself getting further involved in a trap. I take on some creative work, and I live as if that is my life’s ambition. I understand from Your Teaching-Word that Real-God-Realization should be the most important thing in my life—but I find that that is not true of me, so I make my life about some creative work or some goal.

DEVOTEE: I have made that choice and what I notice is that it fades, and then it comes back again. AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Yes, but do you fade? You are the one who commits to practice. Therefore, you must command the body-mind-complex. The body-mind-complex does not decide to practice—you do. Once you know that you are committed to practice, then, if you notice the body-mind-complex being contrary or wanting to do something else, you are in a position to discipline it, to command it. You do not consult the body-mind-complex about whether you should practice on any given day. If you do that, you will always be changing your mind. You will always be making another decision. Some days your decision will be “yes” to practice, and some days it will be “no” to practice—because of the ever-changing state of the body-mind-complex. If you make the body-mind-complex into the source of your practice, you will not practice consistently. You must be the source of practice. Your decision, your commitment is the basis for practice. And, then, you must discipline, or command, the body-mind-complex. And the body-mind-complex has its days. It has its ups and its downs. It is all over the place. What do you expect it to be? Look at what you have done with it all your life. Look at what you have adapted it to—a wide variety of ordinary and conventional purposes. It is used to doing all of that. It is, by adaptation, responsive to all kinds of influences that are about doing such things. What matters is where you are at.

You must consult yourself—not the body-mind-complex—relative to the matter of ego-transcending practice. You must be the basis for the commitment to practice. Then, once such a commitment is made, you are responsible for the body-mind-complex—and there is no point in consulting it, because it will tell you something different in every moment. The body-mind-complex is some sort of trickster—certainly deluded. It comes up with all kinds of stuff. It is just plastic. It is a terminal of plasticity. It is a limit, a coded message. Either you are responsible for it or you are not. However, at the present time, you are not communicating with Me—your body-mind-complex is communicating with Me, pretending to be you. The body-mind-complex is confused. The body-mind-complex is tentative. The body-mind-complex has some attitude today, some other purpose, some this and that. Why should I be having a conversation with it? Do you think I have such conversations with This Body-Mind? Do you think that was the basis on which I “Practiced” during My “Sadhana-Years”-Submission?

You are all the time fussing with yourself: “Should I or shouldn’t I?” That is TV-head. But this is your business. It is no concern of Mine—or anyone else’s. It is your concern. You must find the strength in yourself, if you are going to practice. If you are going to participate in the culture of My devotees, you must live as a practitioner. It is fine to be a beginning practitioner—but you must be a practitioner. If you cannot even choose to be a practitioner, what good is coming into My Company going to do? What would it be for? Do you want to employ Me to talk you into practicing? Tomorrow you can talk yourself into something else. If you think “worldly” forms of “self”-fulfillment can hold a candle to Real God, then that is your problem. That is your illusion. That is your limit. That is your choice.

19. Real self-Understanding Is Right Now

tended to choose circumstances that are somehow “designed” to confirm the separation I was experiencing. I can feel my own double-bind—desperate not to be separated, and (yet) choosing a circumstance that makes me feel more and more that I am separate.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: But how are you going to remember and activate and make effective all those words, all those sentences, in every minute and every moment of your life?

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: You have to observe yourself. And it is not a “sense” of separation—it is an act of separation. This is what there is to find out—your own action. Instead of finding this out, instead of dealing with this act of separation, people seek. There are all kinds of reactivity, desire, and so forth.

How could you pursue union if you did not already feel separate? It is only the feeling of separation that instigates the motive to union. If you did not feel separate from the thing you want to get, you would not have to seek it, would you?

It is all the same. Everything is the search. It is not only so—it is painful, it is stressful, it is agonizing. It gnaws at you constantly. And it is not just some particular thing you are seeking—you are constantly seeking, sometimes seeking many things simultaneously. In any moment, there may be some particular thing or other that you are particularly obsessed about “unioning” with—whatever it may be. If you examine your life, you make the discovery that your entire life is seeking, and nothing else. It is entirely that, in every fraction.

The best way to come to Me would be with a profound sense of the failure of your seeking—a conviction that the search is what you have been up to, but that it is failing, and inevitably will fail. That is the best way to come to Me.

This is why I Say to you that there are two fundamental elements in the Reality-Way of Adidam: “radical” devotion and “self”-understanding. The fundamental practice of the Reality-Way of Adidam is simply “radical” devotion to Me, devotional Communion with Me—but “radical” devotion to Me requires “radical self-understanding”. Therefore, both devotion and “self”-understanding are required.

You Come To Me Truly (or Rightly) When You Are No Longer Resorting To Your conditional “self” (or ego-“I”). Indeed, You Cannot Even Find Me (or “Locate” My Transcendental Spiritual “Brightness” and My Transcendental Spiritual Heart-Blessing) Until You Are Heart-Ready To Resort To Me—By Merely (or Searchlessly) Beholding Me. Therefore, Do Not Seek Happiness From Me. Rather, Be (Searchlessly) Happy With Me. ■

Thus, when you are truly observing the “self”-contraction, it is easy to relinquish it. It does not require any effort. It occurs rather spontaneously, in fact. All the “efforting” takes place when you are not truly observing the “self”-contraction, but are trying to deal with all kinds of things that are “caused” by the “self”-contraction but peripheral to it—and you are struggling to get rid of all of that. That is seeking. The effort to “get rid of something” is seeking. When you truly discover the “cause”, the relinquishment of it is spontaneous. And the seeking, likewise, is spontaneously relinquished, because it no longer has any foundation.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: What do you not see exactly? Seeing that it is your own activity is not the same as truly understanding and transcending it as your own activity. The seeing that it is your own activity can still occur peripheral to it, and it can be a rather intellectual matter, as in the case of observing any “object”.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: It is not an intellectual matter. As I have Said to you so often, the “self”-contraction is a sensation—like pinching yourself is a sensation. When you are at that place, recognizing the “self”-contraction as your own action, it is spontaneously relinquished. You would not have it be otherwise. It is easy to do. It occurs spontaneously. But when you are just figuring-figuring, talking-talking, thinking-thinking, you can come to some conclusions intellectually—such as “I am contracting”, or “the ‘self’-contraction is my own act”—but it changes nothing.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: All those views are total and absolute bullshit. It does not make any difference if the “point of view” comes from someone in a more advanced stage of life or whatever, it is still based on the “self”-contraction, on separateness. And that informs the vision, limits the vision—even of great Realizations. This is the part that makes it false.

Everybody is roaming the “world” in his or her knot—abusing everyone else, suffering stress, and thinking that that is just life. It is not. It is egoity. It is what life becomes when it is fashioned by the ego. It is not what life is. To get what life is, you must deal with the ego, the knot that is producing your adventure, and transcend it, and Realize the Prior Position of Non-separateness. That Realization changes life, even in its ordinary transactions. And, if you persist with the process in My Company, that Realization ultimately becomes Most Perfect Divine Self-Realization.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: My Transcendental Spiritual Self-Transmission Is the Transmission of Non-separateness.

Thus, you are not only seeking—and you must find this out about yourself, that you are always seeking—but you are involved in a perpetual act of “self”-contraction, a devastating act, a “self”-deluding act, an act with the most far-reaching consequences, the act that makes conditional existence into what is traditionally referred to as “samsara”. You are living an illusion because of this act.

You avoid the understanding, and you keep continuing the conversation, the bargaining, year after year after year—even in My Company, still arguing about it, still practicing in a mediocre, ego-possessed fashion, still not making this practice of Listening to Me consequential in your life.

There is nothing I can do about it. I can only Do What I Do, but I cannot do anything else about it. I can only Offer My Word and Be Present among you. That is it. I cannot force you to it. You must respond. You must understand. It must be important to you.

You are just sitting there all by yourself—sitting in your own knot, your own mess, and using all the odd “techniques” that you have generated in a lifetime, and even before, to just feel maybe a little bit better, at least to avoid the stress. Right now you are doing it.

Of course, then you push the “God-slave” button, when you get overwhelmed by the stress and the pain of it—and, all of a sudden, you want the Infinite Floating Deity-Slave of yours, your Teddy-Bear-in-Space, to come down and give you what you want. Then, all of a sudden, you are a “religionist”! There is no such God. It is your own pain talking—inventing God, re-inventing God, re-defining God, bastardizing God. Then you really pull down God falsely.

If you cannot feel good in this moment, when could you feel good? How is it possible to feel good if you cannot feel good now?

The circumstance does not account for it. There is nothing about the circumstance that is producing your suffering—you are! It is what you do! Nobody else is doing it—the environment is not doing it, I am not doing it, the circumstance is not doing it. Nobody else, nothing else—just you.

Therefore, together with sensitivity to Me, there must be sensitivity to the pain of your own egoic approach to Me. You must deal with your own act of “self”-contraction. Only in that case can you Commune with Me most fully. Only in that case can you respond to Me most fully. Whatever you have on your mind, this is not a difficult matter to grasp. It is not difficult at all. The only reason I can state it plainly is that it is so simple. It is not a complicated matter. It is eminently possible for you to understand this, to grasp this point—as I Said when I first began to Teach, the very first night. This is basically what I Told everyone that night.

Investigate it. It can only be investigated in feeling. Talking about it is not the investigation of it for real—not directly. It has to simply be felt, entered into, in a feeling-investigation, a feeling-examination—just of the fact of it, the sensation of it. Feel it. Enter into it in that manner. And see that you yourself are doing the knot. The more you feel that you yourself are doing it, the more it relaxes. And then you begin to feel Me. As it relaxes, you are turned to Me, directly surrendered to Me, truly forgetting yourself, entering into the Field of Non-separateness—Which Is My Very Nature, Condition, Sign, Demonstration, Transmission.

The depth of devotion made possible by real “self”-understanding is “radical” devotion to Me. And you see how quiet it is. To be feeling Me thus—that is devotion.

But to get “turned off” to what is ordinarily going on is the secret of renunciation. From the “point of view” of the “world”, it is not okay to renounce—but, from the “point of view” of those truly involved in Spiritual life and the matter of Truth Itself, it is not only okay, it is necessary.

Those who are most serious and who understand see bullshit all around—not just in their own case, but in everybody’s case—all the usual things being done. It is just nonsense, a harrowing affair of suffering and illusions, going nowhere—absolutely nowhere but on to death!

It is not wrong, in the sense that you should be moralistically negative about it. But just understand what you are doing. Observe it in depth.

Getting that message awakens the heart altogether. It makes you compassionate. It does not make you a negative character in relation to others—it makes you a positive character.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: It does not come from you. It is the Way It Is! Reality Is Non-separateness. Your own knot begins to relax, and, all of a sudden, you are getting the feeling that energy is coming out of you. It only reinforces the notion that energy is inside. It is not inside. You are participating in Reality Itself, Which is Absolute and Universal. It is not inside! It Simply Is! Real God is not inside. The Truth is not inside. It Is! It is All-Pervading and Transcendental, or Absolute.

To be continuous is to be thoughtless—to live in the Great Swoon of Faith, of Absoluteness, of Continuity, of Non-separateness. Then who cares even about death?

You must be serious about understanding and transcending the dis-ease that is motivating your life. Observe it fully. When you observe it, the fingers let go of the pinch, the knot dissolves, in your devotional response to Me. And then there really is “self”-surrender, there really is “self”-forgetting—because of My Attractiveness. That is “radical” devotion to Me.

You must understand: Priorly, you always already feel good. But you presume you are not in the Prior Position. You presume you are in the position of the “self”-contraction. If you Stand Prior to the position of the “self”-contraction, and feel beyond it, you will always already feel good—in the most profound heart-sense. In that case, it does not make any great difference how the body-mind-complex feels—because the body-mind-complex is part of the conditional “world”, and is always subject to negative changes and disintegration and death. But, when you are Awake in the Heart-Place, you always already feel good. Always! Already!

You must commit yourself to the devotional relationship to Me, moment to moment—bodily, emotionally, mentally, with every breath. You cannot merely play at relationship to Me from a distance. You cannot remain “self”-conscious. You cannot keep waiting for Me to amuse you.

Having Found Me, how profoundly will you surrender to Me?

If you were not unwilling to surrender right now, you would Realize Me Most Perfectly, right now. There would not be any way to not Realize Me. There would be no mechanism to prevent you from Realizing Me. There would simply be Me. Every one of you, right now, is dramatizing the refusal to surrender, to some significant degree—and, therefore, you are (of course) refusing it to the ultimate degree.

My Eternal, All-Pervading Divine Avataric Grace keeps you from “experiencing” the worst of your results all the time, and always Gives you a chance to recover, to do right, to Awaken.

There is nothing but the Infinite Self-Existing Self-Radiance of the Divine Self-Condition. Everything is an apparent modification of That. That Is All There Is. Only One. And I Am That One.

Your real “problem” is your “guru”—with a little “g”. You know, Little-ji—Sri Sri Little-ji? Yes. The body-mind-complex, or your separate and separative “self”, is Little-ji—the one who masters your life in every moment, and who is always telling you this and that. I Say something, and you immediately consult Little-ji to find out if what I have Said is correct. You do not simply accept My Word, embrace It, receive It. You only think about It.

You were bullshitting when you said your worst fear is to be separated from Me. It is not true. There is not the slightest truth in it. Your worst fear is to be separated from Little-ji, this body-mind-“guru”. That is your real fear. You do not want to be separated from that guy. You fear the loss of the body-mind-“self”. Your life is not principally about love of Me, love of Truth, Reality, Real God, love of the Master. No—it is about love of Little-ji, love of “self”, egoity, separateness.

You are “bonding” to Little-ji, your worst intimate. No other intimate can hold a candle to Little-ji. You may fool around with an intimate partner, doing your “bonding” games with him or her, and with various friends and relations—but the game you are suffering most is your “bonding” to Little-ji, your separate and separative “self”, your own body-mind-complex.

You need not struggle to give up Little-ji. Simply turn to Me. Do that consistently. Practice “radical” devotion to Me, moment to moment. “Bond” to Me—bodily, emotionally, with all your attention, with every breath. You need not be concerned about struggling to get away from Little-ji.

This is the practice in the Reality-Way of Adidam. Turn to Me whenever any other content, any other sympathies, any other “programs” arise—in other words, in every moment.

No—turn the faculties of the total body-mind to Me. Do not dwell on the content. That is the practice. That is it.

Then your life is simply a matter of devotionally responding to Me, moment to moment. Periodically, you can talk about some content: “Oh, by the way, six months ago I was doing blah-blah-blah, but now I do not get that way anymore. Now I am doing something else. There is still bullshit here—but, nonetheless, I did become more responsible in the past six months.” If you talk about it every day, you are not ever going to get anywhere. Talking about it every once in a while is all right.

You are either turning to Me or you are not. It is as simple and straightforward as that. If you turn to Me, conditional existence is Sublimity.

You need not do anything to yourself. You simply turn to Me.

You reinforce—or you become—whatever you put your attention on. Make Me the “Object” of your attention, the One of your attention. Then the other things will dissolve, like something in your gut. They have no permanence. The “programs” of egoic habit will not persist, unless you give them your attention. If you give Me your attention, then they pass. That is truly how it is. That is the Divine Law. That is the Truth.

All the sufferings are potential there, all the amusements, the pleasures, the distractions. There is no psycho-physical entity that is uniquely immune to natural changes.

If you are afraid to surrender, it is not because of Me—it is because of you. I can gentle Myself up to you, or I can raise My Voice with eyes full of blood. What difference does it make? It is only Me. Ultimately, you will surrender to Me without argument. Pay Me now, or pay Me later—it is entirely up to you.

“Radical” devotion to Me is a simplicity, a directness. It does not require any special capability in the individual, any special qualification. I Am the Qualification. You simply turn the faculties of the body-mind-complex to Me, and the purifying process happens. Remember to do this in every moment, and the purifying process is intensified. Remember your separate and separative “self”, fall back, and you suffer your Little-ji, your bondage to your false “guru”, who beats you over the head, who hates your Liberation, who is jealous of your relationship to Me, who is “self”-protected, who is a phony and a liar, who makes you feel bad but gives you a taste here and there, too—to make you feel a bit good, as if to suggest that, if you love your Little-ji, you will feel good.

Do you feel good? You may feel really bad the next day, but Little-ji will be at your side immediately, always ready to think. Every time you think, you are resorting to Little-ji. I am not telling you to not think—I Expect discrimination from you—but I am Speaking to you about understanding the mechanism of your bondage. Can you see what a farce, what a joke, human life is without Real-God-Realization? Without It, there is only endless justification, rationalization. Ultimately, human life is not to be taken seriously. Of course, dreadful things happen, and then you become serious. Ultimately, however, you stand at a distance—like going to the moon and looking at the Earth from there. The terrible things that happen to people break the heart—no doubt. And, because people are not wanting to have their hearts broken, they cling to things—and so do you. Ultimately, there is a Greater Perspective in the context of this ordeal of suffering all the endings and the sludge. In Most Perfect Communion with Me, and in My Own Divine Self-Condition Itself, there is no personality. There is simply this Indescribable, Immense, Delicious, Absolute, “Bright” Fullness of Being, in Which you cannot make the slightest gesture of differentiation. It is the Eternal Condition. You could die in That Condition, actually—yet, if you are Happy with Me, you will not notice the dying.

Do not try to Commune with Me. Simply give Me your attention. Simply do the practice. If you require your practice to become perfect, then you start working on the stuff of the body-mind-complex. Simply persist in your practice of “radical” devotion to Me. Simply that. Give Me your attention, the attention in your mind that otherwise invests itself in thoughts, the attention in your feeling that otherwise invests itself in emotions, the attention in your body that otherwise manifests in perceptions and noticing the state of the body-mind-complex, the attention in…

Simply keep turning to Me. Be steady with it. That is the practice. If you become concerned about whether or not your practice is perfect or absolute or giving you some great “experience”, then you are turning back to the content again. You cannot measure your turning. Simply keep turning to Me. Put no conditions on your surrender of…

21. Reality Is Not What You Think

DEVOTEE: Beloved Master, what was the purpose for the event of separation that has occurred? Why did it have to happen? I always have this question. I do not understand.

The source of the question is not that you are looking at all of Reality and coming up with a notion about It. The source of the question is your divorce from Reality. You presume that separation has occurred, and that it has occurred in the form that you perceive it. But, in Reality, it is not so. Reality Itself Realized is free of the complication that is based on your presumption.

Mysteriously, in that Reality, there can be the illusion of separation. There is no “why” about it, as if it is “caused”. It is not “caused” by some Ultimate Will. It is an illusion, a presumption, which is possible within this Infinity—because everything exists. But, even though everything exists, what exists is without differentiation, without error. It is Ecstatic, it is All-Love-Bliss, and without the slightest separation.

In other words, your egoity, your suffering, is not “caused” by the Divine Force or some universal force. It is not necessary. It is a liability inherent in Reality, but it is not Reality Itself.

Reality—universally, and Ultimately—is inherently and infinitely surrendered. The infinitely surrendered cosmos can be said to be “caused”, in some sense—but not the un-surrendered universe. To be Blessed is to exist in infinite complexity, without differentiation. That is a Gift—the Divine Gift. But you have presumed your separateness and broken the thread, the cord, of Unity.

It all comes down to this lack of trust—or un-love. If your hearts were full, you would live in this Ecstasy—for even the cosmic domain is a dance of appearance and disappearance, without fault. You are “out of joint” with this Blessing, and I am Revealing to you—have Revealed to you—how to respond rightly. You must surrender. You must trust—just as, when in the womb, you trusted your mother. While lying in the womb, there was inherent trust. That is why the fetus grew—without complaint, without complication. It existed, heart-born, in utter trust of its container, its associate, its source, the energies of its existence—in Bliss.

Instead, you became anxious and afraid, and violated the Divine Law—lost trust, lost faith, lost love, presumed you were threatened. And you have made an entire way of life out of fear. Fear is just mistrust of reality.

If you do not trust, then you do not surrender, and you do not live in the Infinite Ecstatic Sphere of Love. Then you come up with questions like the one you just asked Me. Trust, love, enter into Ecstasy, enter into Reality—then there is no question about it. The cosmic domain exists in the Luxury of Infinite Love-Bliss, without differentiation, allowing the proceedings of changes—birth, death, all the rest—without the slightest philosophical or metaphysical complication about it.

This is why the Source-Condition, the Divine Reality, is sometimes pictured in ferocious forms, like the image of the goddess Kali74 in the Hindu tradition—suggesting that you be Ecstatic in the circumstance of death, of apparent suffering, of process, suggesting that even to trust and Commune with the Divine you must accept process, death, and not wink, not in the slightest.

You do not want Mother Kali! You want some comforting message—a rather utopian message that does not require you to transcend yourself or accept the appearance of conditionally manifested reality as simply an appearance in the Context of That Which Is Infinite Love-Bliss without the slightest differentiation.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: I Am here to Give you more than a glimpse. In Real-God-Realization, there is no one to be hurt. Real-God-Realization does not carry with It the implication of differentiation, or divorce from Ecstasy.

AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Because you live on the egoic scale, and your humanity is defined by egoity, you do not manifest universal compassion. But, in fact, all beings are arising in the same Divine Radiance and Consciousness. All—everything. All Is One in That. All would struggle to survive in the moment of intrusion. All. When you understand this, you cannot draw circles around your own sphere and just be localized in your love and compassion. Your compassion, your understanding must extend to all that is.

But, to do that, you must transcend your own “self”-contraction, your own separateness, your own egoity—and become Godward and Drawn into That Domain in Which there is no fault, no death. You must accept that your own body-mind is a sacrifice, and all body-minds are a sacrifice.

As long as you are “self”-protective and “self”-contracted, you only suffer this. You lose faith—become loveless, in doubt, and full of fear.

Become a sacrifice, make meaning out of your apparent life, by making it into intentional “self”-sacrifice—full of love and faith and trust, full of “self”-surrender, Godwardness, Real-God-Communion. Instead of fearing your death, intentionally use your life as a sacrifice. Make it a right and positive sacrifice, a service of love, of compassion, without “self”-concern—not serving “self”, but serving the Ecstasy of the Whole. And, as much as you can, relieve the suffering of beings. Minimize it—that is the best you can do.

You will have to be a sacrifice constantly, as all beings are required to be a sacrifice, until you are Divinely Translated beyond this perception. But, even while this perception exists, be grateful. What an extraordinary Gift existence is! You could just as well not exist.

Be grateful that you have this opportunity, rather than nothing. While something exists in Infinite Bliss, you have infinite opportunity. Thus, the way to transcend your fear is to become a sacrifice in love—full of trust, and Godward, and serving.

Do not look for some quick stimulation, or congratulations for being an ego. Use yourself up in service. Do not reduce your existence to nothing but human interactions. In your Godwardness, your true ego-transcending practice, let your body be a sacrifice, rather than fear its death. Exhaust yourself in service. You have to die from something—so die from exhausting the body in the infinite attitude of service, or being constantly Godward in Divine Communion, rather than just letting the toxins of the “world” and the negativity of egoity kill you with assorted diseases. They may come along with the exhaustion—so what?

However, My Intervention is not properly understood in space-terms, as if I Am in My Domain and I have to Come to here. This is My Place. It arises in Me. It is inevitable that I Appear here.

You are looking at the process from your “point of view”, identified with the gross body-mind-complex, and not from the “Disposition” of Totality. You are not equipped to foresee the Event of the Ultimate Translation of all the planes of the Cosmic Mandala. At the far reach of that Event—the highest speed of It, the culminating moment of It—things will be transformed in ways that you cannot imagine now. But, Ultimately, all of conditional manifestation becomes obsolete—through Self-Abiding Divine Self-Recognition, through Divine Indifference, and, At Last, through Divine Translation.

When you, as My devotee, talk about “the Divine”, you have some “experience” in My Company that is behind your use of the term. But you also have limitations of all kinds—and your limitations affect your concept, your notion of the Divine. In fact, as I have often Said to you, it is remarkable to Me that, in this gathering of sacred culture, you rarely speak of God, rarely speak of the Divine.